I’ve bought a van and I am happy about it. It’s a Vauxhall Combo, 2006, EJ56ELC. I like the number plate, but no El, it doesn’t mean it’s yours! The van is blue, quite a blue blue, and it is in good order. I’m excited about this van. Yesterday morning I did not know I was about to buy a van, but this one jumped out at me. I wasn’t entirely not looking. I was looking in that vague way you look, dialling in a search on the internet and seeing what comes up. And then Lily was here and I talked about it, then spotted this blue one, and rang the man, Andy – he was selling it for his daughter – and arranged to meet him in Littlehampton. And that was that. I got the train and he met me at the station and we had a little drive out to a supermarket car park and I had a look around. It’s definitely blue, and somewhat shiny. I looked at the tyres. All good. I looked at the engine and had a look at the dip stick – that’s what you do – and it was all there. No milky residue designating bad things, and then I sat in the seat and read the paperwork. 62,000 miles or thereabouts. That’s what the advert said. I didn’t actually look at that at the time, but I looked at the service history, lots of stamps, and the annual miles totting up slowly. I knocked him down by £90, that’s what you do, and we borrowed a pen from the Tescos delivery van man to fill in the logbook. Andy gave me the green slip. I paid in cash, did I say, £XXXX, and that was that. He said I could have made the transfer when I got home. That’s what you do these days. I gave him cash. That’s what I do.

Did I mention it’s blue? No? Are you sure?

It’s blue.

I’ve bought a little blue van, and we’re set to go places together. Boo will come too.